Have you ever felt like you’ve been settling for less-like you deserve better? Well, you don’t have to settle for less than you deserve. Your relationship, wheather it is romantic or not, it should make you feel excited and happy about life. Many people stay in unhappy relationships just because they fear of being alone or can’t picture their life without the person, even if their current situation doesn’t truly fulfill them anymore. Relationships are complex organisms, so it’s difficult to define the overall dos and don’ts. However, some behaviors cross the line no matter what. If your partner’s engaging in any of the following, it may be time for you to rethink your relationship with him or her.
HERE ARE THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER TOLERATE IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Feeling like you don’t come first.
When you’re in a relationship, you want to feel like you’re number one, and that when it comes to making decisions, planning events, or even simply spending time together, your feelings and opinions are the first thing on your partner’s mind. Being an option rather than a priority can feel pretty shitty. If he or she hangs out with friends more than you, for example, that shows they don’t take the commitment very seriously. Never tolerate someone who doesn’t take the time to make you feel special – you deserve someone who will treat you like the king or queen that you are.
2. Physical abuse.
The most telling sign that you are in an abusive relationship is fear of your partner. If you have experienced or seen consistent signs of physical or sexual abuse from your partner, it may be time for you to create an escape plan. Never tolerate an abusive relationship. Be kind to yourself, while also recognizing that you do not deserve this treatment and have every right to leave the relationship.
3. Emotional or verbal abuse.
So many of us accept emotional abuse without realizing it. Physical abuse comes with bruises you can see, but emotional abuse is characterized by manipulative comments and controlling behavior that cause self-doubt. Long-term emotional abuse can result in low self-esteem, withdrawal from family and friends, depression, illness, anxiety, and giving up on goals. First and foremost, a healthy relationship begins with respect for both individuals. You should never tolerate someone who puts you down or makes you feel uncomfortable in any way. Even if you’re having a heated argument, it doesn’t give your partner the right to treat you with disrespect just because they can’t control themselves.
4. Men / Women who cheats on their partner to be in a relationship with you.
Once a cheater, always a cheater. If you find out your partner is cheating on their partner to be with you, it’s time to protect yourself from any further heartbreak by breaking up with this person. There are plenty of wonderful single men/women out there waiting to date you.
5. A partner not publicly acknowledging your relationship.
If you and your partner have mutually decided to enter a committed relationship, as opposed to a FWB, casual dating, or hookup situation, then it shouldn’t be a secret (unless, of course, there are reasons you two have chosen to keep it under wraps, away from family and social pressures, etc.) However, if that is not the case with your relationship, yet they won’t introduce you to friends as a significant other, then consider it a red flag. If you are spending time on the relationship, then you deserve recognition.
6. Someone who doesn’t support your dreams.
Your partner should also back you 150% when it comes to your dreams and goals. It’s impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who doesn’t want to see you succeed. It’s one thing for your partner to provide constructive criticism, or to express frustration if your career has you ignoring the relationship. But if your partner’s insecurity, jealousy, controlling nature, sexist ideology, etc. causes them to actively insult your work ethic, mock your achievements, or even convince you to turn down opportunities, then you need to either confront the issue or walk away from the relationship. A truly supportive partner will encourage you and help you every step of the way.
7. Control Over Your Wardrobe.
Sure this person is going to be seen with you in public a lot. Even so, deciding what looks good on you and what doesn’t is an encroachment on your personal taste, sense of style, and, ultimately, freedom. You should never have to give that up because you’re worried about what someone who’s allegedly so close to you thinks.
8. A Partner Who Keeps You Away From Your Friends.
Your friends are an extension of who you are, to a certain level, and your partner should realize that. Partners who think they can claim you and separate you from your own world can never be trusted.
9. An overly controlling partner.
If you have a partner who can’t let you out of his or her sight without freaking out or thinking you’ll break their trust, then this should definitely raise some red flags. Just because you’re dating somebody, doesn’t mean they have right to control your life. They should respect your need to be yourself and maintain a certain level of privacy when you’re already sharing so much of who are you with them. Feeling wanted and needed in a relationship is normal, but it can go overboard if you’re not careful. Most people enjoy having a partner that asks them for help with certain things or just needs a hug or a shoulder to cry on sometimes. These things are perfectly normal – what isn’t normal, however, is an overly clingy, needy partner who can’t seem to do anything without you.
Adult responsibilities aren’t fun by any means, but they should at least take care of the minimum amount of chores and responsibilities needed for survival, and not only depend on you to do all things.