Setting Boundaries at Work: Protecting Your Mental Well-Being |

Every day, we interact with a variety of people—colleagues, managers, clients, or even strangers at a café. While some interactions leave us feeling inspired and uplifted, others can be frustrating and emotionally draining, leaving us unsettled and exhausted. In these moments, the ability to set boundaries becomes crucial, especially in professional settings where challenging behaviours, power dynamics, and workplace culture come into play.

Lately, I’ve been struggling at work, feeling mentally exhausted from dealing with situations beyond my control. I know I’m not alone in this—many people experience stress in toxic work environments, and it often stems from a lack of respect for personal and professional boundaries.

A recent experience made me realize just how vital boundaries truly are.

Understanding Workplace Harassment and Unwanted Attention

There’s a fine line between friendliness and unwanted attention. Unfortunately, not everyone recognizes or respects that line.

Recently, a male colleague at work misinterpreted my professional politeness as personal interest. Initially, I shared my contact information for work-related matters, but soon, he began texting and calling excessively, buying me coffee, and even showing up uninvited in places I frequented. What started as a simple work interaction quickly turned into a stressful and distressing situation.

This experience made me realize something important: many people, especially women, struggle with setting and enforcing boundaries in the workplace. They often feel pressured to be “nice” or worry about how rejecting unwanted attention from someone might create tension in the workplace.

But here’s the truth:

🚫 Being polite does not mean you owe someone your time or attention.
(Kindness is not an open invitation—your boundaries matter.)

🚫 Setting boundaries is not rude—it’s necessary.
(You are allowed to protect your space without guilt.)

🚫 If someone ignores your boundaries, that’s on them—not you.
(Their actions are a reflection of them, not your worth.)

How to Set Clear Boundaries at Work

If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, here are some ways to assert your boundaries while maintaining professionalism:

1️⃣ Be Direct and Clear – If someone is making you uncomfortable, be upfront. A simple,

“I prefer to keep our interactions professional,” or “I’m not comfortable with this,” sets clear expectations.

2️⃣ Don’t Feel Obligated to Engage – You don’t have to reply to messages outside of work hours or entertain unnecessary conversations. Your time is yours.

3️⃣ Say No Without Guilt – It’s okay to refuse gifts, meetups, or conversations that feel inappropriate. Saying “No, thank you” is enough. You don’t need to justify your decision.

4️⃣ Document Everything – If the behavior continues, keep a record of texts, calls, or interactions. This can be useful if you need to escalate the issue.

5️⃣ Seek Support – If boundaries are repeatedly violated, talk to HR, a trusted colleague, or a supervisor. Workplace safety and respect should be a priority for everyone.

The Mental Toll of Disrespecting Boundaries

Experiencing persistent boundary violations—whether it’s workplace harassment, toxic colleagues, or emotional exhaustion from work stress—can take a serious toll on your mental well-being. In my case, dealing with unwanted attention, alongside an already challenging work environment, has left me feeling drained. Even after 12 hours of sleep, I wake up exhausted.

This is a common sign of mental fatigue, which can manifest as:

✅ Constant exhaustion, even after rest
✅ Overthinking or replaying stressful situations in your mind
✅ Feeling emotionally detached or irritable
✅ Loss of motivation or increased anxiety

If you relate to this, it’s time to prioritize self-care.

🧘‍♀️ Take Breaks – Step away from stressful environments when you can. A short walk, deep breathing, or even journaling can help.

📝 Find Healthy Outlets – Writing, painting, exercising, or any creative hobby can be therapeutic. I personally find comfort in poetry, which I’ve neglected but plan to get back to.

💬 Talk About It – Venting to a trusted friend, mentor, or therapist can provide clarity and support. Sharing my struggles with a close friend recently lifted a weight off my shoulders.

Final Thoughts: Speak Up, Protect Your Space

Too often, people hesitate to set boundaries because they fear being seen as “difficult” or“rude.” But boundaries are not about pushing people away—they’re about protecting your mental and emotional well-being.

If someone makes you uncomfortable, you have every right to:
💛 Speak up.
💛 Say no.
💛 Remove yourself from toxic situations.

Most importantly, never let anyone make you question your worth or convince you that you must tolerate mistreatment just to ‘keep the peace.’

You deserve respect. You deserve peace. And you deserve to be in control of who has access to your space, energy, and time.

Until next time,

X, Hani.