A lot has been going on since the beginning of 2026, and it feels almost unreal to say that we are already in March. January quietly slipped into February, and before I had the chance to fully absorb the start of a new year, I was already planning for April. 

Time has always moved forward, of course, but this year feels different. Perhaps it is because I entered this year with more awareness—a mind full of questions about my life and where I am heading.

Before the year even began, I sensed that something needed to change.

There was nothing particularly wrong with my life—I wasn’t unhappy, and I certainly wasn’t lost—yet there was a quiet boredom I could no longer ignore. It made me question my growth. 

“Was I really moving forward, or was I just repeating the same routine under a new calendar year?”

I began to notice it in the small moments, especially when I caught myself repeatedly saying, “I don’t want to do this anymore,” whenever it came to work. It’s definitely not a routine I want to live with for the next few years.

That quiet boredom slowly revealed itself as something more significant. It wasn’t laziness or dissatisfaction. It was a wake-up call.

Eventually, the answer became clear. I needed expansion—I needed to stop staying comfortable. I wanted something that would challenge me intellectually, emotionally, and even spiritually. I wanted to upgrade myself into a version that is more capable, more knowledgeable, and more aligned with the bigger goals I secretly carry in my heart.

Something that pushes me to grow.
Something that can take me anywhere.

So I made a decision that, surprisingly, did not require much overthinking.

I decided to pursue further studies.

What surprised me most was how little hesitation I felt. I applied almost instinctively, as if a part of me had already made the decision long before my conscious mind caught up. The process went smoother than I expected, and when I received the offer letter—with partial scholarships included—I had to read it twice just to make sure it was real.

I still can’t believe I get to call myself a student again at this stage of my life. It feels surreal. But more than anything, I feel proud of myself.

My schedule is much busier now as I juggle both studies and work, yet there is a strange sense of clarity that comes with it. I already have a rough plan for the next five years, and I can clearly picture the direction I want to take. It’s hard to believe that this new chapter became real simply because I decided to take that first step.

In one of my previous posts, I wrote about wanting the freedom to choose my own path instead of being tied to a routine of going to work. I even said that the only thing that could make that possible was marrying a man who could fully provide for me—though, of course, there was another option (the harder way): going back to further my studies. Fortunately, my job allows me to do that while still getting paid. 

Let’s be real. Finding a man who is both willing and able to fully provide in today’s world isn’t exactly common. So here I am, choosing the second option, investing in myself instead of waiting for someone else to change my circumstances. 

But yes, the decision comes with sacrifices. One of the biggest adjustments for me this year is putting my travel plans on hold… again.

Travelling has always been something that excites me, giving me inspiration and perspective. However, the money I’ve saved will now go to my studies. But if I’m being honest… I still hope I can sneak in at least one small trip. Maybe somewhere nearby, like Da Nang in Vietnam. I’ve wanted to go there for so long.

And if the universe feels extra generous… maybe the Netherlands. 

Realistically, I know that finances may not allow such trips this year, but I’ve learned that it doesn’t hurt to hope. Who knows? Maybe I’ll get lucky.

I can’t predict the future. But I pray things will be easier for me—that more doors will open when I’m ready and that my hard work will pay off. All of this—planning, sacrificing, hoping—makes me realize how much I’m changing, not just in my circumstances but in my outlook on life.

Getting older is funny, you know. 😂 It has shifted my interests in ways I never expected. For example, I used to feel indifferent about politics, especially global affairs. Now, I find myself actively reading about world politics and international relations. I pay attention. I ask questions. I truly want to understand what’s happening around the world.

Maybe it’s because the older I get, the more I see how connected we all are—how decisions made in one corner of the world can ripple across oceans. And honestly, there’s too much injustice in this world to simply look away.

In a way, this growing curiosity is also one of the reasons I chose to further my studies. I feel a quiet pull toward being involved in something meaningful—something related to global understanding or even world peace. I may not have all the answers, but I know the intention is there, and staying informed is the first step toward becoming part of the solution.

And that’s often how it starts.

So far, 2026 has taught me not to be afraid to start again. 

The rest of the year is uncertain, but I know this version of me is braver than last year’s.

And that’s enough for now.

If you’re also in a phase of reinvention—bored, restless, wanting more—maybe this is your sign to do something scary and exciting.

We’re not too old.
We’re not too late.
We’re just getting started.

I feel excited about what the future might hold for me and, most of all, about the version of myself that I am slowly becoming.

—Auri Duham 🌻