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Unkindness. We’ve all felt it—the sting of words or actions that leave us asking, Why me? In those moments, it’s tempting to react—to defend ourselves or to make them feel the same pain. Do we fight back, let it slide, or take the harder path: rising above it? Learning how to respond when people hurt us is one of life’s harshest lessons.

Last year, I faced one of the hardest tests of my patience with someone who was so unkind to me—a situation that could have left me bitter. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt. It did, deeply. But instead of letting it harden my heart, I chose to see it as a lesson in strength and grace. 

How do you deal with unkindness?

The answer lies in one word: Patience.

When faced with unkindness, the natural response is to defend ourselves or fight back. But patience doesn’t mean letting things slide; it’s about staying in control and refusing to let someone else’s negativity define your behaviour. It’s not easy—it’s exhausting—but it’s worth it. After all, we don’t need more people like them. 

Responding to hurt with hurt only fuels the cycle. In the past, I let my ego push me into arguments to prove a point, but I’ve learned that kindness is the stronger response. Walking away with a smile isn’t a weakness—it’s emotional maturity. It leaves room for reflection, often showing others more about themselves than words ever could.

Don’t stress about what happens next. Whether you believe in karma, divine justice, or just the passage of time, trust that life has its own ways. Let go and focus on your peace—you’ll be glad you did.

P/s: Patience and kindness may not feel like the easiest choices, but they lead me to something far greater than revenge: peace.

Can we really forget?

No, we don’t.

We live with the memories, but we can choose how we carry them. Accept that you were wronged and step away. Walking away doesn’t make you weak; it shows you value your peace over the need to be right. Some people thrive on winning arguments, even at the cost of happiness. Don’t give them that power.

That said, I understand how anger and hurt can overwhelm you. It’s easy to fantasize about revenge. When I faced mistreatment from my ex’s mother, I struggled to let go. I wanted her to feel the same pain I did, but harbouring resentment only delayed my healing. I realized that to heal truly, I had to stop reliving what had hurt me.

How forgiveness helps us move on.

Forgiveness isn’t about letting someone off the hook—it’s about setting yourself free. I’ll admit that forgiving those who hurt me wasn’t easy. I told myself I had forgiven them, but lingering anger and sadness proved otherwise. It was a process of confronting and releasing those emotions, step by step, that led me to genuine forgiveness.

I eventually forgave the person who was unkind to me, not because she apologized—she never did—but because I deserved the peace forgiveness brings. Instead of dwelling on her actions, I focused on myself: enhancing my appearance, meeting new friends, and learning new things. Forgiveness shifted my energy toward healing and growth.

The truth always reveals itself.

For example;

• One example that stands out is when my so-called best friend betrayed me. What started as a misunderstanding got worse, and instead of apologizing, she played the victim and spread false rumours about me. It hurt deeply, and I decided to cut her out of my life. Years later, some of her friends reached out to apologize, admitting they’d seen her treat others the same way. In the end, the truth came out, and I found peace knowing I wasn’t the only one she had hurt.
• Before my painful breakup with my ex, I wanted closure and tried to reach out, but he ignored me. Six months later, two girls he dated contacted me for answers about his behaviour. Surprisingly, my ex reached out to me as well. So, I took the chance to say everything I needed to say. I got the best closure I could ever ask for. 

The point is, just because you let something go doesn’t mean they get away with their wrongdoing. Life has its own ways. You just need to have faith in it.

The process of healing and letting go.

Healing and letting go is a personal journey. We all experience pain, but how we handle it is what helps us heal and move forward.

For me, finding ways to cope has been key. Books, especially Najwa Zebian’s writings, have been a big part of that. Her words speak to my soul, giving me comfort and strength to keep going.

Writing in my journal also helps. Putting my feelings into words helps me process them, almost like releasing built-up pressure. It brings me clarity and relief. Along with journaling, talking to my mom and closest friends has been a huge support. Their understanding makes me feel less alone in tough times.

Music has also been a comfort. Certain songs just seem to capture how I feel, helping me relax and lift my spirits when things get heavy.

Conclusion.

Looking back, I never thought I could forgive people who are unkind to me. But when I look at myself now, I’m glad I did. When we have negative emotions such as anger, bitterness, or hatred, we can’t think with our right mind. These negative emotions are a burden to carry around. In the end, I realized I needed to let go in order to move forward.

Before I wrap up, I want to remind you that healing is different for everyone—it happens in our own time and in our own way. I’ve been through a lot, so I can say I’m a survivor. I heal quickly, but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy. People often ask me, “How can you forgive?” or “How do you forget?” The truth is that healing takes courage. We all have that courage inside us, but sometimes we have to dig deeper to find it.

So, yeah. Keep reminding yourself—over and over—not to compromise who you are or stoop to their level. Always choose kindness. It speaks for you. 

Until then.