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If you’re struggling with low self-confidence and self-esteem, always feeling like you’re not pretty enough, stylish enough, smart enough, or perfect enough, trust me, that can change. It’s not something you’re born with or without, and you definitely don’t have to rely on others to fix it for you. Everyone, to some degree, faces moments of insecurity. No one was born with unlimited self-confidence. The way we grow up, the people we surround ourselves with, the things around us, and how we view ourselves all play a huge role in shaping it.

I’m still dealing with the same issues, no doubt, but now I know how to face them. I’ve broken through that wall of fear more than once, and each time I’ve done it, it’s fueled more success.

So, how do you overcome it? Below are 6 things that have helped me, and I believe they can help you too. The list isn’t exhaustive, but these are just a few of my favourite tips that have worked for me. Try them out, and if one doesn’t resonate, move on to another.

1. Take care of your skin and body. 

The most important thing when it comes to building self-confidence and self-esteem is how you feel about your physical appearance. I believe everyone is beautiful in their own way. The difference comes from how you take care of yourself. Sometimes, we feel like it’s not important, and we brush it off, thinking, “Let people say what they want.” Remember, you are responsible for your own body. If you love something, you take care of it, right? The same applies to yourself. No one else will do it for you.

Use good-quality beauty products, take supplements if needed, and consult a dermatologist if you’re struggling with your skin. Don’t let societal standards dictate your beauty. You don’t need to be thin or curvy to be beautiful. If you want to change your body for your own happiness, go for it. But if not, just focus on being healthy and embracing your body, no matter the size.

2. Dress well, even at home. 

We often think dressing well is about impressing others, but it’s really about how you feel about yourself. Wear what makes you feel good, and you’ll notice a boost in your confidence. And yes, even at home! Dressing up, even in your own space, can make you feel empowered. Avoid wearing worn-out clothes or anything that makes you feel sloppy. I also recommend having at least one set of sexy lingerie—it has the power to make you feel more attractive, confident, and yes, even sexy. You can also wear a little makeup if you like, because, why not?

3. Stay away from negativity. Take a break from social media if needed.

Social media can sometimes make us feel like we’re not measuring up, especially when we find ourselves comparing our lives to others. I’ve been there, and I know how it feels to wonder why my life doesn’t seem as good as someone else’s. If you’re following me on Instagram, you may have noticed that I take breaks from social media from time to time. It’s a mental detox for me, and it’s been so helpful.

If you find yourself comparing your life to others, I highly recommend doing the same. Focus on your own journey. Also, surround yourself with people who lift you up, not those who criticize or bring you down. You don’t need negative people in your life.

4. Improve yourself constantly. 

If there’s something about yourself that you’re not happy with, take steps to improve it. Change can be good. For example, maybe it’s time to try a new hairstyle. Experiment with different haircuts, colours, or even treatments. Do some fashion research to avoid being a victim of trends. It may be a trial-and-error process, but that’s part of the fun. Eventually, you’ll figure out what works best for you. One YouTube channel that has been a huge help for me is School of Affluence. I’ve learned so much from it.

5. Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you

The people you spend time with play a big role in shaping who you are. There’s a saying that goes,

“Who and what we surround ourselves with is who and what we become.”

Make sure the people around you love and support you, not only when you’re together but also behind your back. Spending time with the right people will bring you joy and fulfilment, while toxic individuals will drain your energy, leaving you feeling frustrated and unhappy.

6. Fake it until you make it.

Yes, you heard me right. Even if you’re not feeling confident, fake it. Stand tall, pull your shoulders back, and hold your head high. Smile, even when you don’t feel like it. Smiling releases brain chemicals that improve your mood and reduce nervousness. Work on your communication skills, take on challenges that push you to learn and grow and commit to tasks that raise your skill level.

“Faking it” doesn’t mean pretending to know things you don’t—it means adopting a confident mindset until you’ve truly grown into it. Eventually, the “fake” will become real.

Building self-confidence takes time, but remember, you don’t have to do it alone. Try different approaches, find what works for you, and give yourself grace along the way. You’ve got this!

Until then, Hani.