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If you are low in self-confidence and self-esteem; selalu percaya you tak cukup cantik, tak cukup bergaya, tak cukup pandai, tak cukup sempurna, dll.…trust me, that can be changed. It is not genetic, and you definitely do not have to be reliant on others. It’s something semua orang hadapi, to some degree, I think. Nobody was born with limitless self-confidence. Cara kita membesar, dengan siapa kita bercampur, perkara-perkara di sekeliling kita dan cara kita pandang diri kita sendiri sangat mainkan peranan penting dalam mempengaruhi self-confidence. If someone nampak macam ada self-confidence yang tinggi, it’s because he or she has worked on building it for years. I’m having the same issue still, undoubtedly. But now I know how to beat them, that I can break through that wall of fear and come out on the other side. I’ve done it many times now, and that success will fuel further success. 

The question now: “How do you overcome it?”

Below, I outline 6 things that will help you do that. The list certainly isn’t comprehensive. These are just some of my favorite things that worked for me. Pick and choose those that appeal to you and give them a try. If they work, try others. If they don’t, try others. ♥

1. Take care of your skin and body. 

Perkara yang paling berkait rapat dengan self-confidence dan self-esteem adalah sifat fizikal you. To me, everyone is pretty in their own way. Bezanya adalah cara you take care of yourself. Sometimes kita rasa macam tak penting, biar la apa orang nak kata…Kan? Ya, biar la apa orang nak kata but you have to remember that you are responsible for your own body. If kita sayang something, kita akan jaga benda tu betul-betul, kan? Do the same to your body. Nobody else will do it for you; use quality beauty products, take supplements if you need to and go see a Dermatologist if you can’t fix your skin problems on your own. One more thing, you don’t have to be thin or curvy to look beautiful. Not everyone can lose weight or gain weight easily. If you want to change it for the sake of your own happiness, then, it’s good. But if not, just enough to be healthy. Embrace your body no matter what size. 

2. Dress well walaupun berada di dalam rumah. 

We often think that dressing well is about impressing others. For some people, it may be, but wearing what you feel good in will help you embrace who you are and what you look like. It’s about feeling good. Do it even when you are at home. This will give you a little bit of a confidence boost. Jangan la pakai baju atau seluar koyak-koyak di rumah or anything yang buat you nampak comot or ibu I cakap “sememeh”. Own at least a pair of sexy lingerie too. It has the power to make you feel more attractive, confident, and sexy which in turn builds self-confidence. And yes! you can put some makeup on too because, why not?

3. Stay away from negativity. Take a break from social media if you have to.

We all have social media. Sometimes bila kita browsing and see certain people, kita suka bandingkan diri kita with them. I know this because I did the same before sampai tahap buat I rasa down and asked myself, kenapa life I banyak kekurangan. If you are following me on Instagram, you will notice that once in a while, I like to take a break from social media to detox myself from it. It’s good for my mental health. You should do it too if you found yourself comparing things with others on social media. Then, focus on yourself. Lagi satu, stay away from people yang suka kutuk or kritik you. You don’t need this kind of person in your life.

4. Improve yourself constantly. 

If you have something about yourself you are not satisfied with, please do the necessary changes to improve yourself. Sometimes, change is good. For example, your hairstyle. Try new things regularly: a new haircut, different hair colour, or maybe do some treatment? You kena rajin buat research online. Learn about fashion too supaya you tak jadi mangsa fashion. It can be a trial-and-error process, but it’s okay. In the end, you will know what works well for you. You can check out this youtube channel: School Of Affluence. I’ve learned a lot from here. 

5. Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you.

The people you surround yourself with have an impact on your goals. There is a quote that goes, “Who and what we surround ourselves with is who and what we become”. Make sure you surround yourself with people who love you and support you, not only in front of you but also behind your back. Spending time with these people can fulfil you and bring you joy while toxic people will suck the positive energy right out of you, leaving you feeling frustrated, drained, and unhappy. 

6. Fake it until you make it.

Yes, you heard me. Fake that confident feeling, even when you’re not feeling it. Try this: Stand up straight, throw back your shoulders, and lift your head. Smile, even when you don’t really feel like it. The physical act of smiling releases brain chemicals that will make you feel better, and might even quell some of your nervousness. Improve your communication skills. Commit to things that provide learning experiences and challenge yourself with tasks to raise your skill level. Faking it till you make it does not mean faking knowledge that you never bother to gain. After a while, what’s fake becomes true.